ADHD: The Hidden Engine

Back in the 70s, we didn’t have "labels." You were either a "good kid," a "quiet one," or a "little shit" who couldn’t sit still and was generally disruptive. If you struggled to focus, people didn’t rush to defend you or make excuses, they just thought you weren't paying attention and let you get on with it.

I grew up in that world and looking back, I realize that the absence of a label was actually my greatest head start.

​I remember the first time I even heard of a thing like "Autism" back in 1997, my first day at a new job in East London. My new manager told me he had to leave early and visit his kid’s school because he was very autistic. I genuinely just thought he was being a bit of a dick, showing off because he was from Dagenham and his kid was really good at art.

It was about a week after he kept mentioning it, that I realised his kid may not be that talented and asked a colleague what was wrong. I got a shrug and a basic explanation “he’s a proper little shit apparently”. It may not have been the most in depth or factually accurate explanation but without the internet to research, I at least knew what he meant and where he was coming from.

Nowadays labels are everywhere, every other kid seems to have one and even adults are getting in on it. I’ve lost count of how many clients have told me they are dyslexic, like I was expecting them to read me a story or something. And I’m sure we all know someone who can’t work because of their anxiety, whilst the rest of us just cartwheel with happiness into work every day.

Accepting that ADHD is considered genetic, it’s fair to presume that people from my generation would have been affected too. Couple that with how prevalent it seems now and it’s fair to presume that it must have been pretty widespread then.

​The 11 Test Sprint

Let’s be brutally honest here, sometimes I can be a bit strange. So after some basic research and a lot of time on my hands due to rain, I sat down to take an online ADHD assessment.

I am not talking about one that tries to sell you an app at the end or tell you you’re wonderful because that’s the thing to do. I searched for independent versions which were used by doctors around the world, to use as a definitive guide to diagnose ADHD. As a bit of a spoiler, I didn’t intend to take just one, I planned for eleven...because I wanted a definitive answer.

​Unsurprisingly by the time I had taken my sixth, the scores were high and I had that definitive result across the board.

The result? I am now the owner of a label and it turns out I’ve been driving a Ferrari engine with the brakes on for decades.

My first thoughts genuinely? Disappointment. I was thinking more of a time traveller from the 1960’s or a toned down version of Jesus but as it turns out, I was just normal like everyone else…and I’ve never wanted to be like everyone else. I didn’t really care about having a label because after 54 years, I know what I’m like, I’m not going to change and I’m never going to make excuses for it.

However on the flip side, I did get a massive buzz because it gave me something new and unexpected to get obsessed with. It also explained a lot about me, the 100mph mind, the black or white approach to everything and the ability to fall out with anyone over nothing.  

But here’s the thing...had I known that as a child and been labelled like many today, I doubt that I would have achieved anything near what I have so far in life.

​High Speed, Zero Patience

​Having ADHD isn't about being "broken" apparently. It’s about being wired differently. The way that it has been sold to me, it’s like having a high performance engine that is permanently wired to go 100mph.

​When that engine is focused on a goal—like training a client, resolving an issue or building a business—it’s a superpower. That’s why losing weight, training for an event or anything that needs discipline, is not a problem for me

But when that engine is "idling," things get really messy. That’s where the "zero patience" for basic expectations comes from and why just going into a shop, is fraught with danger.

On the work side the most relevant example, is when someone pays me to help them but doesn’t make any effort themselves.  Firstly there’s the frustration of not being allowed to provide the level of service they need/want and paid for. Secondly, the concern that others will judge my professionalism and ultimately me, on the back of it.

I can and do say that I don’t care but that would be one of the very few times, where I don’t tell the truth. Just consider that I have spent whole evenings stressing over a minor mistake that I made in a session and you get an idea why I’m like I am.  

​The Power of the Missing Label

​I’ve achieved everything in my life—the businesses, the physical transformations, the amazing life experiences—without being labelled. And I’m so grateful for that.

​In today’s world, there’s a lot of "poor you" and a lot of "protection" and I find it incredibly frustrating. People get a label, which they happily use as a shield to hide from the hard work. If I had been labelled early on, I could have been "protected" right out of my own success. I might have been told what I couldn't do instead of just going out and just doing it.

​It’s the same as when I lost the weight back in the day. There was no sympathetic approach or "safe space." It was just: "Get on with it, because no one is coming to help you." That lack of sympathy forced me to develop the discipline, that now defines my life.

​The Final Word

​I’m sharing this because I want to be 100% transparent and even mentioning it to my closer circle, has revealed others experience the same.

It’s not a business ploy or an expansion idea because I’m fully booked. Neither is it a search for sympathy because there’s nothing to be sympathetic about...I’m still the same person, having an amazing life and wouldn’t change any of it, apart from maybe coming to Malta sooner.

​My life right now is absolutely spot on for me personally. It might not be how many would choose to live it but we are all different. If I’m being really honest, I’ve not met anyone with a life that I’m actually jealous of…and that’s the absolute truth.

Obviously more money would be nice but then you attract people purely because of that and all the fakery that goes with it. I'd rather have no money, be with those that actually want to be with me and not for what they can get from me.

​If you’re looking for a PT who’s going to tell you you’re amazing when you’re not, I’m not your man. But if you want someone who knows exactly how to take a high pressure, overactive mind and turn it into a high performance machine and get obsessed about it, then you’re in the right place.

​Labels are for clothes, not people!